The following is an article I wrote entitled “God’s Surprise Gift” which will be published in God Moments III: True Love Leads to Life, to be released next year by Joseph Karl Publishing and was posted to their blog yesterday.
For several days after my mom shared the news, I remained shocked and surprised but very, very happy. My 47-year-old mother was going to have a baby.
One thing was certain: I had never seen my mom so happy. She became a widow at age 44. A short time later, she met and married my stepfather. Although my stepfather had four daughters from his first marriage and my mother had four children from her marriage to my father, neither imagined there would be any children from their union.
The challenges became apparent as soon as she began to tell people. My mom’s obstetrician/gynecologist (the same doctor who delivered me 22 years previous) scowled when my mom asked for an “official” pregnancy test, explaining that she had taken an “at home” test and it was positive.
“You’re not thinking of having it, are you?”
“Of course I am.”
“You can’t have it! You have a one in ten risk of having a child with Down Syndrome, not to mention all the abnormalities that come with increased maternal age.”
“I want to have this baby.”
According to my mom, the doctor continued pushing and pressuring her to have an abortion. However, my mom had always had a strong personality. She didn’t back down nor did she acquiesce to his wishes.
Finally, she said, “I’m having this baby.”
The doctor replied, “Then you’ll have to find another doctor. I won’t be delivering it.”
When she arrived home, my mom was angry. She spent the next ten minutes yelling and pacing the floor. She was frustrated with the irony of the words “pro choice.” She wasn’t given any choice but to abort. She eventually found a Catholic pro-life doctor to deliver her baby. Since it had been 20 years since her last pregnancy, there were some concerns and challenges. However, this doctor took very good care of her.
Of course, her previous doctor wasn’t the only one who reacted negatively. Some friends and relatives thought my mother and stepfather were crazy to be happy about an “unplanned pregnancy.”
“This is obviously an accident,” one person commented. My mother’s response: “This isn’t an accident. It’s a surprise. Those are two different things.” Another person said, “It was obviously unplanned.” My mom would shake her head and say, “Not unplanned, just a surprise.”
The day came for my mom to deliver. It was a rainy Tuesday evening. My siblings and I waited outside the delivery room. Finally, we heard a baby crying. We were soon given the news that my mother had given birth to a baby girl. We were thrilled! We had a new baby sister to love, and my mom continued to call her “God’s surprise gift.”
“God’s surprise gift,” my youngest sister, is now 30 years old and a novice with the Dominican Sisters of St. Cecilia in Nashville. Before entering the convent, she worked for many years at a crisis pregnancy center and spent most Saturday mornings praying in front of an abortion clinic.
My mother passed away in 2007. However, our entire family remains grateful that she and my stepfather chose life for my sister. I can’t imagine the world without her.
Photo and Text copyright 2011 Ellen Gable Hrkach
God’s thoughts and ways are not our thoughts and ways. Your mother was amazing and you must be so proud of her. Wonderful story! I am sure that God the Father is saying this about your sister too; that she is a “surprise gift” to Him and to us. Thanks for sharing.
Thanks so much for the comment, Gloria! You are so right that God’s thoughts and ways are not our thoughts and ways. I’m grateful that my mom and stepdad were open to His gift!
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That’s an amazing story. And so “angrifying,” to quote Simcha. She nailed it right on the head–“pro-choice” offering only one choice. What a jerk. And what a wonderful gift for your family!
Indeed. I thank God every day that my mom and stepdad were pro-life! My sister is amazing!
Your mom’s soul must be extra bright in heaven for standing against the pro-death cabal. Shame on that doctor and blessings on the doctor who took care of your mom. I love the way she called your sister a surprise – connotating something joyful and blessed. Now you all have a sister who will pray for you in a special way through her vocation.
Indeed, Barb! I’ll never forget how absolutely happy my mom was to find out she was pregnant (and the wonderful expression on her face!) We all miss her very much…
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Your story brought tears to my eyes. Your mother must have been an amazing person.
Thanks, Carol. She was an amazing person and I miss her very much…
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